Why Pronouns Matter

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How do I know someone’s pronouns?  Ask! During introductions or as a check-in with another person.  It may initially feel awkward but this discomfort is far less hurtful than using the wrong pronoun.  Here are some suggested questions to use: 

“What pronouns do you use?”

  • “How would you like me to refer to you?”
  • “How would you like to be addressed?”
  • “Can you remind me which pronouns you like for yourself?”
  • “My name is Sarah and my pronouns are she, her, hers. What about you?”

So what if your child asks to be called by a different pronoun?  Do it. They are trusting you to know who they are. 

Know that you’re going to make mistakes.  And if you are like me, you’re going to make a lot of them.  I was corrected for weeks until I got it. Most of the time. I still slip up.  I’m human and I spent 15 years using one set and now have to learn a new skill. 

What I do know is that my child is my child feels a greater sense of security with me knowing I respect their identity. 

Do I correct others?  Yes. But only those with whom my child has chosen to share their pronouns.  This has offered us a great opportunity to communicate and for me to show a new level of respect for my child.  Because who they are matters. 

What’s in a pronoun?  Respect. Is this a struggle for you?  I can help. Reach out on the website or email me at sarah@sarahkennedycoaching.com

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